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Past Experience
Most recently I had profiles at Plenty of Fish and OK Cupid. I liked OK Cupid and their profile set-up. I really liked the questionnaire for matching people. Both of these sites are free. I think I had more contacts with OK Cupid. I had a Skype "date" with one person and went out to dinner a couple of times with another guy. I think the quality of eligible bachelors was better at OK Cupid. I had been with both sites for probably around 2 years.
As I'm a Christian, eHarmony has been recommended several times. However, it is pricey and for someone who's on the fence about online dating, I didn't want to waste may money. They do have occasional free weekends and I did try it. There are a bunch of steps you have to take before there is communication outside of the site. During the free weekend I made it through the hoops to email directly with one guy. After a few emails though he stopped communicating.
So my experience with dating sites haven't been great. Actually the person I've talked to the most through the Plenty of Fish and Ok Cupid is someone I know in real life. Oddly enough, I noticed he is on ChristianMingle.com now too.
Creating a Profile
Creating a profile is the most difficult part of a dating site for any online dater. For me, I battle between saying too much and not saying enough. I tried to be really open about who I am and what I'm looking for with my OK Cupid profile. I wondered if it was too much. So I swung the other way with Christian Mingle going with minimal information. Like most sites there is the basic info - do you drink, smoke, have children, etc - questions. But the introduction section is where you either shine or not. I kept it brief with just a few sentences. And it isn't too shiny. It is difficult to come up with something witty when you think you're boring and unlovable - not really high selling points. Given that online dating has pretty much been a bust for me I'm not don't really see the point in putting in a lot of effort (I really did try with POF and OK Cupid).
Christian Mingle has a few more questions in their essay section about being a Christian, past relationships, and what you think your future holds. Since my past relationships have consisted of one 6 month relationship and a handful of dates, I don't really have good answers for that one.
Finding a Match
I don't know if online dating is for me. Actually I'm not sure dating is for me at all. However, living in suburbia doesn't lend itself to meeting single guys very often. Add to it that I live outside a college town, the prospects of meeting a guy in his mid to late 30s is really slim. I tried to go to a networking event last week at the museum, but it seemed cliquish. People either came in groups or already knew people. I found it very difficult to introduce myself to groups that were clumped together. Online dating seems to be the best bet and you would think when 90% of my relationships are through Facebook or Twitter that I would have a good chance of making a connection with a dating site.
I've looked through some of the profiles and a few people have caught my eye. I know people are looking at mine. 43 people have looked at my profile since I created it a week or so ago. But there hasn't been any messages. I've gotten 3 "smiles". I have the free account and I don't think I can send emails through the site and perhaps that is what is going on with most of those who have viewed my profile. I don't know.
I would love to make a match, fall in love, and be married. Yet, I don't think it is likely. Maybe I need a dating coach...
Your Turn
Tell me about your dating (or lack thereof) experience. Have you tried online dating? Any success? If you haven't tried online dating, why not? Do you meet potential dates in real life?
And while we are at it, I know everyone has dating advice. So lay it on me - what's your dating advice?
